HELL

sad-black-woman

Suzy’s hands trembled as she placed the white plastic stick back on the covered toilet seat. She was seated with her bare butt, at the edge of the dingy tub, willing herself not to cry as she stared at the two red bars in the dent of the stick. She clasped her hands together and fit them between her knees, swaying back and forth. It made no sense crying, but her throat felt tight and sore and she wished she’d just drop dead. The rock on her engagement ring was pressing into the side of her left knee but she still had her legs clamped tight, locking her fingers, not minding the pain. She could still hear Jerry snore in their bedroom and she felt faint. What was she going to do? How was she going to deal with it? Everything had become loud; she could hear the clock tick from way out in the kitchen.

 

She got up, walked to the faucet and splashed cold water on her puffy face. She picked the pee stick up and after carefully wrapping it in tissue with the wrapper it came in she dropped it in the toilet bin and sat back down. A shiver ran through her as the images came back. She had gone there to have a word with him, to get him to take responsibility for his actions. She had gone for Kyerewaa, her best friend. Talk to him for me she had said, Tell him what’s going on with me. And God knew she loved Kyerewaa to bloody bits. It didn’t matter that he was her Ex, it didn’t matter that he was an asshole. Nothing mattered till he had her up against the wall, taunting her You came to talk eh? Are you sure? And there was the evil snickering into her ear. It wasn’t till he was nibbling at her neck and she was no longer sure if she was fighting him or herself. Not till his hand moved up roughly up her thighs and yanked her panties down her trembling legs, ramming his fingers into her. And she, bathed in anger at the inappropriate pleasure she was feeling, and shame that she was weakening, it was not till any of that. Not when she let him carry her to his bed, pry her legs apart and thrust in with blinding force, making her back arch and her mind explode from the very betrayal of herself. The tears on her face, the whimpering, his husky voice telling her to keep it down, his calloused hand coming up to cup her mouth and his sudden spasms and grunts as he spilled his evil in her…it was not till it had all ended and she had curled up in a ball trembling while he got up and walked out into his bathroom with his penis hanging as limp as she felt, in front of him…wasn’t till then she knew she should have stayed clear out of hell.

 

She got up and walked to the bathroom door, staring at her husband. How was she going to explain it to him? What does one call what had happened to her? Rape? When she could clearly remember her hands grabbing his head, holding him against her chest, when she could still remember how she said his name more than once, not from anger, not from rage? When there was anger first then pleasure and then anger again? How was she to explain the pleasure in between her most dominant emotion? He stirred and her heart turned to mush and flowed down into her knees, making them buckle slightly. He had left a day after their wedding, 6 months ago, and had only returned the previous night, too tired to do much; they had only shared kisses and cuddled. How was she to explain the pregnancy? He wouldn’t believe her and neither will Kyerewaa.

 

Silenced by her fears, she moved noiselessly to the bed, slipped off her night dress and climbed into the bed. She slipped her hand down the sheets, surprising him out of his light sleep when he responded to her touch. “Hi there love” he smiled, and she smiled back, faintly “Are you ok?” He asked, squinting. “I am,” she whispered. “I’ve missed you, that’s all,” and she got up onto her knees, and straddled him along with his shaft. “I miss you too,” he moaned and soon, for a brief moment, it was just the two of them, but in her mind the devil was there too and she was sorry, terribly sorry for the life-long lie she had just initiated.

Advertisement

28 thoughts on “HELL

      1. Um..I was expecting it to end with her having sex with the man when she found out,so that it will be like nothing happened and the pregnancy is pinned on her man…ermmm..that was how I was thinking. M

        Like

  1. Amma, when are coming out with that blockbuster novel? Can’t wait koraa…you know how i enjoy reading these pieces. I was hoping she was going to commit suicide though..😁

    *Claps*

    Liked by 1 person

  2. *makes sign of the cross* too vivid.
    Erotica affects me more than porn.
    My Mind was so clogged with images, I didn’t have time to feel sorry for her husband

    Like

  3. very good piece of writing. i must say you’re brutally good with words. this was a 5mins well spent. i really enjoyed it. also can’t wait for your novel Ama Konadu.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s